Imparting Pearls Of Utter Foolishness

After slogging through 250 pages of why ISDN H-channels are not the same as N x 64 channels, my brain, like a recalcitrant pony, is balking at the sheer thought of reading another page. It's not the best behaved brain in the world, mind you. After 250 pages, it always balks. It's like clockwork. I've tried caressing it, feeding it tasty oats and taking it for a trot in the morning, but right now it looks a little fagged. Maybe I should put it out to pasture.

However, I have learned some valuable lessons from reading Telecommunications: A Beginner's Guide, which I would like to share with you, dear reader.

1. There is a reason why Cisco's marketing materials sound like they were written by an army of monkeys on crack. Because they were.
2. These are probably the same goddamn monkeys who invented English pronunciation rules, or rather the lack thereof.
3. Switches are essentially modern-day witchcraft, and anyone who understands them has probably sold his soul to the devil.
4. This joke is still not funny:
   Q: What did the data terminal equipment say to the data circuit terminating equipment?
   A: 10101001110001010010100100100101000100111!
5. All work and no play makes Trench an unspeakably dull boy.
6. When I'm reading this bilge, I can't get no inspiration. But I try. And I try. And I try. And I try.
7. The next textbook I read will have pictures, color-by-numbers and crossword puzzles. You know, something like "Pokémon Visits the Polymer Processing Plant".
8. Whoever wrote the ISDN chapter is guilty of committing acts of gross boredom and should be boiled in oil. Feet-first.
9. Advanced Intelligent Networks are pretty cool, actually.
10. I used to say that the best thing about being a translator was the fact that you were constantly learning. Now, I think it's a toss-up between learning and writing. God, I missed blogging.